in which i praise Mark Shea?

i’ve said before how much i loves me some good ol’ fashioned righteous anger. but coming in at a close second has got to be the glorious feeling of shadenfreude i get at seeing different brands of fake “catholics” ripping into one another and inadvertently exposing the sham that is the novus ordo amchurch.

“forget all that crap about turning the other cheek, that guy just said something bad about Ron Paul!”

“ha, even my beard is smarter than you”

although there are examples of this all over the place, a particularly favorite source is the self-described “jolly” Mark Shea, who is forever taking shots at his fellow fake “catholic” fraudsters for not thinking exactly like him.

don’t have a gay best friend? anathema sit.

don’t oppose the right wars and military practices? anathema sit.

don’t abhor the tactics of certain pro-life groups? anathema sit.

don’t hate Michael Voris and blame him for all the world’s problems? anathema sit.

don’t hate faithful laymen and love everything the n.o. bishops say and do? anathema sit.

don’t love everything about his superawesomefakecatholic web portal? anathema sit.

now please don’t get me wrong: despite the protestations of “Fr.” James Martin, there isn’t anything inappropriate about appointing yourself ad hoc to the CDF or the magisterium and condemning everything that falls short of the standards of the real catholic faith, SO LONG AS YOU ARE A REAL CATHOLIC.

obviously, given his condescending stance toward those who love tradition and conspiracy theories, Mark Shea is not.

personally, and despite his ignorance of the true faith, i have the utmost respect for Herr Shea’s tactics, which would otherwise make him a natural frothing traddie troll if it wasn’t for his broader fidelity to the “pope.”

perhaps there is hope for him yet.

“i’d like to see obama’s drones launch missiles like these bad boys.”

then again, perhaps not.


8 Responses to “in which i praise Mark Shea?”

  1. […] this seems unnecessary and rather uncharitable, at least to me, but what else would you expect from Mark Shea? i’ve heard he eats […]

  2. […] first of all, Trina (if that is your real name), really?!? i’m the one who is unhealthily obsessed? have you even seen Shea’s blog?!? i think we can all agree that he has gone waaay over the line compared with me. […]

  3. […] days it seems like all the so-called “catholics” are either heathens, heretics, or apostates. or in a boy band. yup, that’s The Jerk on the far left, before he […]

  4. […] self-righteous anger of all the critics is just awesome to behold (and you know how i loves me some self-righteous […]

  5. Troll II,

    The Internet moves fast and some times it seems the current topic is the only topic, so I don’t normally leave comments on older posts. However, so many of your posts have no comments, so I thought it would be ok. Besides, the way you handle Mark Shea in this post tells me you’re just the right-thinking man I need help me with what may be a scrupulous concern involving Mr. Shea.

    I have a recurring dream where I look out the window and see Mark Shea walking up the path to my front door. He knocks and I open the door. Before I can stop myself, I say “Mark, I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and I will not vote for Romney.” He gets a look on his face a lot like the one he has in the last picture you used (when did he downgrade the beard to a goatee?) and then disappears or is assumed bodily into heaven. (The dreams switch between these two endings. If I avoid spicy foods at dinner, I usually get the disappearing ending, which is much less horrifying.)

    Now I know we’re not culpable for the moral content of our dreams (thankfully, given the dreams I had about Gina from freshman English class when I was 16,24, and 32 years-old). But it bothers me that my dreams may be profane/blasphemous in applying words from a “mass” to Mark Shea. So my question is: does the fact that I’m using words from a fake mass lessen or eliminate my culpability?

    Thank you for your consideration of this decidedly un-funny problem I have.

    Also, don’t lose all hope about Shea. He converted from Evangelicalism to Fake Catholicism, and if there’s one thing I know about converts, it’s that if they can do it once, they can do it again. He may come around yet.

    • ah yes, the dreaded Mark Shea dream. recently, mine have been involving a large bronze thurible, a badminton racket, and a jar of pickles. it starts with Mark and me playing chess, when all of a sudden he happens to notice that my queen looks like Amy Welborn. we then proceed to debate about the merits of G.K. Chesterton’s impression of Dale Ahlquist, until i hit him with the racket for refusing to stop speaking in pig-latin. then we wrestle, and here’s where things get weird, as you can probably imagine.

      in answer to your question, i wouldn’t worry too much about your exchange being from the n.o. mass, and in english, since the words are at least from the updated translation, which is much less inaccurate (but of course horribly blasphemous just the same).

      ps – thanks for reading, and i’m sorry for the delay in my response.

  6. […] speaker, you ask? why Mark Shea, of […]

  7. […] i’ve always been a fan of his bitterness, and i think it’s safe to say that he’d do better apologizing for his innumerable other […]

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